Saturday, September 10, 2011

Why I don't have a dog

So the other day at work, the topic of pets came up and someone asked me why I don't own a dog, besides the obvious fact that I barely scrape by as it is because I won't leave for something better, (I'm a very complacent person) I'm happy with the way things are now. Dogs, unlike my cat, require a lot more upkeep. My cat poops in a litter box, I clean it out once a day, takes a few minutes tops. Dogs have to go poop outside, my backyard is filled up enough with bird droppings and broken tree branches from the 3 trees in my backyard that I'm pretty sure have some type of plant leprosy.

 Neither my girlfriend or myself would ever be home to take it for walks,wait, scratch that, we'd be home, neither one of us would do it, I come home from work, grab a soda out of the fridge and fire up the Simpsons or whatever else I have recorded on the DVR. They require upkeep like vet visits, depending on the dog, grooming and factor in the fact we live in a pretty small house (compared to our friends who all have 4 bedroom houses, our little 2 bedroom looks small.) it just doesn't make sense to me. My main argument for this though has always been, but we have Momo!

This is the Momo. Fear him, for he bites. Sometimes. 

Momo or Stinky as I sometimes refer to him, is our cat, his actual name is Gizmo. We've had our little orange ball of terror for roughly 2 years now. We adopted him from a family member who couldn't take care of him, which was supposed to be temporary but here we are 2 years later and he's still here.  Momo has 3 things that he has to do: Eat, Sleep, Poop. That's it. If he's not doing one of those 3 things, he's usually doing the 4th, which is driving me nuts. Most cats as nature shows and other people's cats have taught me, they are only really playful as kittens, as they get older, they sleep a lot and usually don't do much else. Not mine, he has a weird obsession with doors and bottle caps. I've been woken up many of nights to him playing with our kitchen cabinet doors, opening our freezer door so he could knock down a tub of ice cream that he tried to eat, or bringing me random trinkets he finds around the house that he wants me to throw so he can bring back. His favorite items to bring me are bottle caps, hair binders and oddly enough, drinking straws. The straws are the best thing to watch him take, he will trot around like a show pony usually bringing it to his kitty toy fortress, in other words, his food dish.

Accept me as your all-knowing and powerful ruler and nobody gets hurt.

 Not everything about him is bad, he does like to greet me at our door as I come home from work, usually because he expects treats which he is very vocal about getting (he has a very distinct meow for treats, and another one for when he's upset he got locked into a room).For everything he does that annoys me, he makes up for it with doing the occasional cute thing or by being there when I need him to be. Whenever I come home from work and put my keys away, I usually end up giving him treats and sit down to watch tv in the living room, the second I sit down, he comes and sits in my lap and watches tv with me, he'll usually sit there until I move him or he finds something that interests him elsewhere in the house.

We've been through a lot together, when I left my apartment and decided to move into our house, Mo wanted to make sure I didn't leave him behind, so as I packed up my computer, he hopped inside the box and began meowing at me, he wanted to make sure he got to come with.

Hey you, don't forget to bring me with, I wanna come too!

 Shortly after we bought our house, we wanted to move furniture in and get things set up before we brought him home, so I left him at our apartment complex. Every day until I brought him home, I'd go to the apartment to check up on him, on more than one occasion I ended up sleeping on the floor of my old apartment because he didn't want me to leave and I felt bad about leaving him. I guess the real reason I don't have a dog is, nothing else could replace the companionship I have with my cat, he's my little boy and nothing will ever change that.

Dreaming of Cheeseburgers and  Caturdays

1 comment:

  1. Yes, you think that. But really, he has eerie mind controlling powers!